Perfection is an Illusion

 If you’re waiting to be perfect, you’ll never start…

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I remember when I wanted to start a new career in freelance writing. I spent a lot of time practicing my craft... 

And every time I wanted to apply for a job, I felt I wasn't there yet. 

I'd spend some days going through blog posts of freelance writers that I considered perfect. 

And I'd feel, nah, I'm not there yet. I don't qualify. My writing isn't that good. My editing skills were far worse. 

I became stuck for months. I wanted to be perfect. I wanted my writing to be flawless before I could start out and apply for those freelance jobs. 

My desire for perfection became a significant barrier to personal growth.

And I know you may sometimes feel that you need to be perfect before doing something. 

Your desire for perfection may have stifled your creativity, ruined your self-esteem, or even sabotaged your relationships... 

You're tired of being held back by your unrealistic standards... 

But you don't know how to break free. 

I'm going to help you. I managed to break free from my desire for perfection, and I started out in my freelance career. 

And you can break free too.

In this article, I'll take you through the signs that you may be chasing perfection and provide actionable tips to help you overcome perfectionism. Keep reading!

Signs that Indicate You May Be Chasing Perfection

Here are some signs that show that you’re chasing perfection.

1. Procrastination

Procrastination is a common sign of chasing perfection. 

You might find yourself delaying tasks, not because you're lazy, but because you're afraid of not doing them perfectly. 

You spend hours planning, researching, and organizing, but when it comes time to execute, you freeze. 

This fear of not meeting your own high standards can lead to constant delays and unfinished projects. 

You tell yourself, "I'll start when I'm ready," but that "ready" never comes because there's always something more to perfect. 

This cycle of procrastination can prevent you from making any progress at all, leaving you frustrated and stagnant.

2. Excessive Criticism

When you chase perfection, you often become your harshest critic. You scrutinize every detail of your work, finding flaws that others might not even notice. 

This excessive self-criticism can be paralyzing, making it difficult to appreciate your achievements. 

Instead of celebrating your progress, you focus on what you could have done better. 

This relentless pursuit of flawlessness can damage your self-esteem and make you feel like you're never good enough. 

You might rewrite a piece multiple times or spend hours fixing minor issues, draining your energy and enthusiasm.

3. Avoidance of Challenges

Perfectionism can make you avoid challenges altogether. The fear of failing or making mistakes can be so overwhelming that you prefer to stay within your comfort zone. 

You might decline opportunities, not because you lack interest, but because you doubt your ability to perform perfectly. 

This avoidance behavior can limit your growth and keep you from experiencing new and enriching opportunities. 

By staying in your safe space, you miss out on learning from failures and gaining valuable experience. 

Your potential remains untapped as you shy away from anything that might expose your imperfections.

4. Unhealthy Comparisons

Constantly comparing yourself to others is another sign of perfectionism. You measure your success against the achievements of your peers, often feeling inferior. 

Social media exacerbates this tendency, as you're bombarded with images and stories of others' seemingly perfect lives and accomplishments. 

This comparison trap can lead to feelings of inadequacy and jealousy. Instead of focusing on your own journey and progress, you become preoccupied with how you stack up against others. 

This unhealthy comparison can erode your self-worth and make it difficult to appreciate your unique strengths and accomplishments.

5. Difficulty in Decision-Making

Perfectionism can also manifest as difficulty in making decisions. You fear making the wrong choice and facing the consequences, so you overanalyze every option. 

This indecision can lead to missed opportunities and wasted time. You might create endless pros and cons lists, seek excessive opinions, and second-guess yourself, all in an attempt to avoid making a mistake. 

This paralysis by analysis prevents you from moving forward and can cause you to feel stuck and overwhelmed. 

The pressure to make the perfect decision can be so intense that it hampers your ability to take action and learn from experience.

6. All-or-Nothing Thinking

All-or-nothing thinking is a cognitive distortion where you see situations in black-and-white terms, with no middle ground. 

If your work isn't perfect, you consider it a total failure. This mindset can prevent you from recognizing and appreciating your efforts and incremental improvements. 

For example, if you set a goal to write 1000 words but only manage to write 800, you might see the entire endeavor as a failure rather than recognizing that 800 words are still a significant achievement. 

This type of thinking can discourage you from taking on projects unless you're certain you can execute them perfectly, limiting your opportunities for growth and success.

7. Overemphasis on Results

When you're focused on perfection, you tend to emphasize results over the process. The journey becomes less important than the destination. 

You judge your work solely by its outcome, overlooking the skills, knowledge, and experience you gain along the way. 

This results-oriented mindset can make every project feel like a high-stakes test, increasing stress and anxiety. 

If the end product doesn't meet your exacting standards, you might disregard the value of the effort and learning that went into it. 

This can lead to burnout and a sense of constant dissatisfaction, as even small imperfections can overshadow your overall progress and achievements.

8. Reluctance to Delegate

A perfectionist mindset often includes a reluctance to delegate tasks to others. You might feel that no one can meet your high standards, leading you to take on too much work yourself. 

This can result in overwhelming workloads and burnout. You may spend excessive time on tasks that others could handle, simply because you fear they won't do them perfectly. 

This not only hampers your productivity but also prevents you from developing trust in your team and fostering a collaborative work environment. 

Your inability to delegate can stifle your professional growth and limit the potential of those around you.

9. Fear of Criticism

Perfectionists often have a heightened fear of criticism. The thought of receiving negative feedback can be terrifying because it threatens your self-worth and validates your fear of not being perfect. 

This fear can lead you to avoid sharing your work with others or seeking feedback, which is crucial for growth and improvement. 

You might revise and rework your projects endlessly, trying to shield yourself from potential criticism. 

This avoidance behavior can hinder your progress and keep you from learning from others' perspectives. 

The fear of criticism can make you overly defensive or shut down constructive feedback altogether, depriving you of valuable insights.

10. Work-Life Imbalance

Chasing perfection often leads to an unhealthy work-life balance. 

You might spend excessive hours on your work, striving to perfect every detail, at the expense of your personal life. 

This imbalance can result in stress, fatigue, and deteriorating relationships with family and friends. 

You might neglect self-care, hobbies, and social activities, believing that your work must come first. 

This relentless pursuit of perfection can lead to burnout and a diminished quality of life. 

The pressure to achieve flawless results can consume your time and energy, leaving little room for relaxation and enjoyment. 

Recognizing the importance of balance is essential for maintaining overall well-being and long-term success.

Read Also:

Stop Telling People Everything!

When Do You Need to Find Yourself?

5 Ways to Become the Woman You’ve Always Wanted

9 Actionable Tips to Help you Break Free From Perfectionism

Here are tips that helped me break free from perfectionism and welcome a life of balance, growth and happiness.

1. Set Realistic Goals

One of the first steps I took to break free from perfectionism was setting realistic goals.

 I used to set overly ambitious targets that were impossible to achieve perfectly, which left me feeling defeated. 

Now, I break larger tasks into smaller, manageable steps and focus on completing each one to the best of my ability. 

This approach helps me maintain momentum and reduces the pressure to be perfect. Celebrating small victories along the way has been incredibly motivating and has helped me appreciate my progress.

2. Embrace the Learning Process

I learned to shift my focus from the end result to the learning process. In the past, mistakes felt like failures, but now I see them as opportunities to grow. 

Embracing challenges and understanding that errors are a natural part of growth have made a huge difference. 

This mindset shift has allowed me to enjoy the journey and recognize that each step forward, even if imperfect, contributes to my overall development.

3. Practice Self-Compassion

Practicing self-compassion has been a game-changer for me. 

I used to be my harshest critic, but now I try to treat myself with the same kindness and understanding that I would offer a friend. 

When things don’t go as planned, I acknowledge my efforts and remind myself that perfection is not the goal. 

This approach has helped reduce self-criticism and fostered a healthier, more positive outlook.

4. Set Time Limits

Setting time limits for tasks has been crucial in preventing overworking and endless tweaking. 

I used to spend hours trying to perfect every detail, but now I allocate a reasonable amount of time to complete a task and stick to it. 

This practice helps me prioritize what’s important and encourages me to move on rather than getting stuck in the pursuit of perfection. 

It has significantly boosted my productivity and reduced stress.

5. Seek Feedback

Actively seeking feedback from others has provided me with valuable insights and helped me grow. 

In the past, I feared criticism, but I’ve learned that constructive feedback is a tool for improvement, not a judgment of my worth. 

Embracing feedback has allowed me to refine my skills and build confidence in my abilities. 

It’s also helped me see my work from different perspectives and recognize areas for improvement.

6. Accept Imperfections

Accepting that imperfections are a natural part of life has been liberating. 

I used to strive for flawless execution in everything, but I’ve learned that it’s okay to have flaws. 

Embracing my imperfections has led to greater self-acceptance and reduced the pressure to be perfect. 

It’s also allowed me to take risks and try new things without the fear of failing, opening up new opportunities for growth and creativity.

7. Limit Comparison

Limiting my tendency to compare myself to others has been essential in breaking free from perfectionism. 

I used to measure my success against others’ achievements, which often left me feeling inadequate. 

Now, I focus on my personal growth and accomplishments. Keeping a journal of my achievements has helped me see my progress and stay motivated. 

This shift in focus has made me more content and confident in my journey.

8. Practice Mindfulness

Incorporating mindfulness practices into my daily routine has helped me stay present and reduce anxiety. 

Techniques such as meditation, deep breathing, and mindful walking have grounded me and kept me focused on the present moment. 

This has reduced my tendency to overthink and obsess over achieving perfection, allowing me to approach tasks with a calmer, clearer mindset.

9. Delegate and Collaborate

Learning to delegate tasks and collaborate with others has been a significant step in overcoming perfectionism. 

I used to take on too much work myself, fearing that others wouldn’t meet my high standards. 

Trusting others to help has relieved some of the pressure and brought new ideas and perspectives to my projects. 

Delegating tasks has also allowed me to focus on areas where I can make the most impact, promoting a more balanced and effective approach to my work. 

This has not only improved my productivity but also strengthened my relationships and teamwork skills.

Read Also:

I Was Ghosted By Someone I Liked So Much; Worst Feeling Ever

Abusive Partners are Always Nice to Other People

Why Hitting your Goals Won’t Make you Happier

5 Books that Helped me Break Free from Perfection

I am an avid reader. And when I was stuck and trying so hard to break free from perfection, I read some amazing books that made my journey easier. I simply ordered them on Amazon Kindle and read them in softcopy.

I’ll share them with you. 

Maybe they can make your journey easier too. 

1. "The Gifts of Imperfection" by Brené Brown

Order your copy of the Gifts of Imperfection on Amazon

2. "Daring Greatly" by Brené Brown

Get your copy Daring Greatly on Amazon.

3. "Mindset: The New Psychology of Success" by Carol S. Dweck

Get your copy of Mindset on Amazon.

4. "The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck" by Mark Manson

Order your copy of this book on Amazon.

5. "You Are a Badass" by Jen Sincero

Get your copy of this book on Amazon.

6. "Big Magic: Creative Living Beyond Fear" by Elizabeth Gilbert

Get your copy on Amazon.

7. "Self-Compassion: The Proven Power of Being Kind to Yourself" by Kristin Neff

Order your copy on Amazon.

Final Thoughts

Aiming for perfection can hinder progress, stifle creativity, and increase stress. 

But if you adopt the above tips, you'll be on your way to a more balanced, fulfilling, and productive life. 

Remember, life is not about achieving a state of flawlessness; it's about growth, balance, and happiness. 

Cheers to a better you!